7 common parenting mistakes & how to avoid them
As a parent, everyone wants their journey to be smooth and perfect. Nobody parent would want to commit a mistake deliberately, but there are times when they just depend on their ‘parenting impulses’ and don’t attempt to get help.
Sadly, a significant number of us aren't intuitively ready to comprehend what to do in every single circumstance that we come across as parents. This often results in us in committing errors now and again.
Figuring out these seven common parenting mistakes and how to avoid them will get you closer to being a better parent:
1. Not trying to fix problems
Either in light of the fact that they believe specific issues can't be settled or they basically rush to acknowledge them, numerous parents persist months or long stretches of dissatisfaction living with basic issues. This may incorporate sleep time battles, visit night awakenings, or continuous hissy fits and behavior issues in older kids. In spite of the fact that it might take some diligent work, most issues that you look at as a parent can be worked through, changed or settled. You may require some assistance, however. Your child might not come with guidelines, but there are a lot of books, individuals, stories that can help you manage through the difficulties of parenting.
Your pediatrician and other wellbeing experts can likewise be useful when confronting more troublesome or relentless issues about your child.
2. Overestimating or underestimating problems
Before you attempt to settle issues, you need to first choose what is and what isn't an issue. What's more, in the event that it is an issue, how enormous of an issue are you confronting? Overestimating and underestimating an issue is one of the most common parenting mistakes.
Is it a major issue if:
- Your preschooler has periodic fits of rage?
- Your 5 or 6-year-old is ‘caught' playing doctor-doctor?
- Your high school kid starts to test their breaking points, invests more energy far from their family, or endeavors to be independent?
When all is said and done, the appropriate response in each of the three circumstances is no. These are simple age-fitting issues that aren’t out of the ordinary. Then again, you shouldn't deal with an issue lightly where an adolescent is discovered smoking, stealing, or cheating. It’s just about weighing what is actually worrisome and what’s petty.
3. Having unrealistic expectations
On the off chance that you have unreasonable desires for what your child ought to do, you can really make an issue. This regularly happens when parents get baffled or eager with a 2 year+ old child who is still not interested in potty training, a 5-year-old who is wetting the bed, or a grumpy teenager. So, ensure that your desires echo with what your children are fundamentally capable or expected to be doing.
4. Being inconsistent
Only a few things can hurt your kiddo a lot, but nothing as much as inconsistent parenting does. For instance, if in certain cases you appear to be extremely strict with your child and in other cases, you don’t seem to care much about what they are doing, it’s a problem. It is because your child won’t know in most cases what is expected of them in various situations. It is thus imperative for you to be consistent in your approach and make the little one know clearly about what you like and what you don’t.
5. Not having rules or setting limits
You may feel that you are helping your child out by giving them a chance to do whatever they need, yet most kids discover it particularly difficult to live with no points of confinement. Having rules, setting limits, predictable schedules, and offering restricted decisions will enable your kid to know and expect what is coming for the duration of the day.
6. Fighting back
Getting stuck in disruptive patterns of communication can lead to some major issues and hence, this is one of the most common parenting mistakes. Battling your child or battling back can take different turns, such as, getting distraught, hollering, and repeating yourself again and again. Battling or contending with your child offers them negative attention and a lot of control over you since they can trigger such solid responses. Instead of ending the trouble, fighting back will lead you to unexpectedly rewarding the bad behavior you're trying to stop. Rather than battling back, you can improve the situation by halting power struggles and adapting more compelling discipline systems. These can be similar to time-outs and utilizing coherent and logical outcomes, and not squandering a considerable measure of time battling before you utilize them.
7. Not changing what doesn't work
Not perceiving or changing your parenting procedures that aren't working is nearly as large an issue as not endeavoring to settle issues in any case. Is what you are doing working? For example, you may imagine that punishing is a successful weapon of discipline, however, in cases where you have to use it daily to rectify your child’s mistake, it definitely isn’t. Another instance could be the bedtime routine you have set for your kid. If the little one keeps getting in and out of bed even when it’s a set time for him to sleep, wakes up tired the next morning, it is time for you to change your approach.
Converse with your pediatrician, speak to your elders and friends if you feel you are making one of these common parenting mistakes. It will help you avoid and overcome these issues.