Every pregnancy and every pregnant woman is unique. There is no such thing as ’normal͛’ when it comes to emotions during pregnancy. While some women may feel an instant connection to their unborn child from the moment they pee on the stick, for others it can take until the birth (or even after the birth) for that connection to truly take hold.
It may not be something that many pregnant women discuss openly, but in fact, a lot of women do struggle to bond with their babies during pregnancy. If this is your first pregnancy, those first rushes from inside your uterus can be hard to identify as your baby’s movements. If you have experienced loss before, you may find it hard to think positively about the pregnancy, and may subconsciously be delaying bonding as a form of self-protection. Or perhaps, you are simply bonding with your baby in your own time.
Pregnancy can be a daunting phase and is not really a bed of roses always. At times, you may feel so overwhelmed with it and the responsibilities that the impending motherhood is slated to bring that you would have an extremely hard time trying to bond with the bump. You may feel guilty about the same and fret over the fact that despite growing closer to your due date, you are not growing closer to your baby, yet.
When your due date approaches, building a connection with that little human inside you becomes all the more imperative. This is more so because it would later help you to prevent yourself from slipping into postpartum depression or having baby blues.
There are a plethora of ways to bond with the baby in the womb, using your voice, keeping a namesake, involving the father, reading, with music, and many more.
Bonding with your unborn baby
Here are some things you can try to help you bond with your bump:
Use your voice
You should start speaking to your baby bump more often now. When your little angel would be born, she would be able to build an instant connection with you by hearing your voice and recognizing it, because she would have spent months put together listening to the same voice of yours while still being inside your tummy. When your baby is born, she will recognize your voice and turn towards you whenever she hears it. Talking about your day to day activities, about how you feel your baby would look once she comes out, about how you feel. It need not make sense all the time, but you can talk about anything under the blue sky! From Shah Rukh Khan to the Maggi you crave to have at midnight, make your baby your own little audio journal.
Grandma’s Tip: Some women find it awkward to speak in monologues when there’s no reply from the other side. In case you are one of them, try singing to the bump instead. It can be while you are sitting idle or taking a shower, any positive song is fine.
For now, your baby͛’s only method of communication is bumps, kicks, and nudges. You have probably noticed that your baby becomes particularly active when you sit down to rest. Play with your baby by responding to her movements, gently poke back when she nudges you, and see what she does. You can also rub your belly in the area you feel movements.
Get a happy snap
Sometimes bonding becomes difficult during pregnancy because you have absolutely no idea about how your baby looks like. Though she is a little human inside you, you are totally clueless about who he or she is, how he or she is. So, to feel a more intense connection with the little one, get your ultrasound scan pictures in hard copy on your next doctor’s appointment. Keep looking at it every day or frame it by your desk at work, set it as your phone’s wallpaper. This will make you feel more connected to the baby.
Go to yoga
Prenatal yoga classes have gained a lot of popularity in recent times as they are beneficial for you and your baby in numerous ways. It would not just help you escape the tedious, monotonous life you lead but would also help you focus well on your pregnancy.
Your yoga teacher would guide you through each and every pose, explaining in detail how it benefits your pregnancy. There would be also time allocated to you to relax and emphasize on your developing little one. Yoga is also a very valuable asset when it comes to dealing with depression or anxiety in your pregnancy journey.
Get the daddy involved
Get the baby’s daddy involved in this exercise too, as it’s not just you but him as well who would want to and love to bond with the little one. Every time you feel the little one’s kick, place your partner’s hand on your tummy and make him feel this joyful moment that would make him connect with the child, even more, feeling his or her physical presence inside your tummy. Let him rub your bump in the same spot the baby just kicked, and don’t forget to capture a picture of his smiling face! You can also make your partner read to the bump. Watching this would make your relationship with your partner even stronger.
Make something for the baby
Invest your time into making something for your little one, as a keepsake or simply a gift. Be it knitting a sweater or a blanket or designing a photo frame with some creativity to be kept in the baby’s nursery-- it could be anything. In case you are not so much into arts and crafts, start with a very basic project that doesn’t make you ponder much. Take it easy.
Take a lot of pictures of the baby bump
These pictures should be of every week, chronologically, so that once your pregnancy is over, you can look back and then keep it as a good motivation to begin your post-pregnancy weight loss journey. You can also have a professional photographer do a photoshoot of you and your partner, with the highlight being your baby bump!
We know there’s a lot going in your mind right now and there are things you want to do, but taking it slow is essential. Don’t do it all today because you simply don’t need to. Taking rest during this period is mandatory, so don’t over-strain yourself. Relaxation is essential, for you and for the baby.
Delegate when you can
You don’t need to do all the chores by yourself not that you are slowly reaching a more advanced stage of pregnancy. Delegate the work whenever and wherever possible. Don’t hesitate to take help from family members or your maidservant.
Focus on the good points
It is okay to feel anxious about your motherhood and but stressing about the future, in case of your pregnancy or any other thing will render nothing good. Instead, choose to focus on the present and live your life the way you want. Many women complain of anxiety-filled dreams in their pregnancy, wherein they are apprehensive that they would become terrible mothers, or simply feel like what if some mistakes of the previous generations are repeated. Go easy on yourself and cut yourself some slack. Cross that bridge of worry when you come to it.
Push the negativity far, far away from you and your little one and be happy. Stop overthinking!